Insomnia

As my time away from the working world has gone on I've found myself waking up earlier and earlier. From not always getting up before Kelly left at seven, to beating her alarm at six, to yesterday at my desk writing by five. That actually worried me. I didn't want to push that time back any further. So what do I make of this morning waking up and writing my morning pages by 2:45. I figured that would put me back to sleep but no dice. It's 3:20 and I'm lying here awake typing this on my phone. I'm not even worrying about anything. I had a good productive day yesterday. Went to sleep by 10. What the heck? I think I may be coming down with something. I think I'm going in search of the Tylenol PM. Kelly just informed me that she took the last too. There is something else in the medicine cabinet that supposed to be all natural. I'll give it a try. Or maybe I'll be back here in a half an hour.

Birthday

Today is my birthday. I am 42 years old. The joke I've decided to adopt for the day is to reference the Hitchhikers Guide books and complain that I still don't know the secret to Life the Universe and Everything. Yet looking at what has happened to me in the past year and wondering how it's all going to play out in this next year makes me wonder if I'm not closer than ever to finding out the truth about Life the Universe and Everything.

I've written before how crazy this last year has been. I've written it for myself over and over. Today marks the end of nine consecutive months of writing in my journal every single day. All but 5 of those days have been over 750 words. So through all these changes in my life I've been recording. Nine months in makes me feel good that I've got a solid habit that I believe that I can keep up, hopefully for the rest of my life. Typically I've been writing about what has happened to me. But lately I've been thinking that I want to write more about what I want to happen to me. Looking forward is not a standard position for me. But in this next year I want to live a little bit more in the future. Maybe I can spilt the difference and end up living more in the present. Well see. Let's let it be this morning that I'm filled with hope and surrounded by the love of those that care for me.

Golden Gate Park

Finally some new pictures. On Wednesday after I dropped Kelly off I took a stroll with my camera in the park. For the most part all I did was circle the de Young. It was a time to shoot and I came away feeling pretty happy about it. Here's to more in the days ahead.

Golden Gate Park Set on Flickr

I've to reset my flickr account too. The lacadaz account is still there but all my new photos are going up on this new photostream.

This Circuitous Route

I've been having a heck of a time trying to figure out where my new public persona is supposed to live. Since changing my name and trying to abandon the lacadaz internet handle I've parked blog names on Blogger, Wordpress and Tumblr. I've even messed around with iWeb. I'm still having issues figuring out just who I am. Why is that? Nicolas says it's another midlife crisis. Funny, I don't feel like I'm in crisis. I just feel a little unsure of my footing. It has been one of those crazy years. It's like when I tried to go through every single growing up rite of passage the night I graduated from high school. I've moved back out of the city, gotten married, been found by my father, added all this new family into my life, changed my name, lost the job I was thinking of keeping for the rest of my life. Change has been the name of the game this year and sometimes it has felt like the ground isn't quite solid.

Anyway here I am, under my own, real, original name, married to a South City girl, living on the peninsula. It has seemed like a circuitous route in many ways lately. I had thought about using long strange trip but apparently that phrase has been taken. Anyway, this here is my new corner of the internet. There is a companion site on Tumblr under the same name. This Circuitous Route. I was going to use that to log what I'm reading and getting a kick out of and so forth.